After 30 years in public education, I've retired! I am now the President of AARP Chapter #1, in Youngtown, Az. - the 1st Chapter ever 'to Serve, not to be Served!' I offer important information, challenging opinions, and inane humor.
Please spread the word about this blog-site, so that others may avail themselves of my assistance. I will do my best to provide a voice - even if it is only MY voice! This is Az I See It....if you can handle the TRUTH!
Az I see it....for those who can handle the TRUTH!

Az I AARP It....

- I am off to Washington, DC, for a few days - AARP's 50th Anniversary celebration!  Hope to see some of you at the next Chapter #1 meeting, Septmber 12th(5:30pm), when Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio will be our guest speaker!

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Az I Play It....

     - It is time for the annual Arizona Cardinals report - Yes, Kurt Warner is the starter.  The fact that this decision took the Whiz so long to come to is reason enough that they will not be successful this season.  The other fact is that the offensive line remains the same, with the coaches again feeling that one more year of playing together will make a positive impact.  Actually, not even your elite QB's or RB's can thrive with the offensive line and the poor play selection(which is limited by the poor quality of the offensive line!)
     With Warner at the helm, the cards may get to 8 - 8.  But I'm certain that he will not be allowed, o be able to play the entire season.  So, with Matt Leinart, the Cards will endure another 'year-for-the-future,' and limp home at 6 - 10 - again!(7 - 9 at best!)  Sorry, it's just not in the Cards!

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Az I See It....

Prologue - Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car!

International - A British environmentalist rowed 2,900 miles, to Honolulu, to raise awareness about plastic debris polluting the ocean. "It was challenging, but very worthwhile," said Roz Savage, her progress slowing only to attend to 'personal matters,' which were dumped overboard - into the ocean!....Scientists have discovered that men who cheat on their partners are more apt to be lacking certain genes.  Typically Levi's or Wranglers!

National - The Republican National Convention and Hurricane Gustav are the two main topics of interest, this week.  One is a huge, raging mass of hot air, causing $10B in damages - and the other is Hurricane Gustav!....Obama's selection of Joe Biden as his Vice President is disappointing, to say the least, but McCain selecting Sarah Palin is great - for the Democrats!....The worst reason to vote for a candidate is because you think they are a nice person!  The worst reason not to vote for a candidate is because you think they're not a nice person!....The bankruptcy rate for those aged 55 and under has fallen, but for those over 55, it has soared!

State/Local - Labor Day weekend DUI arrests approached, but did not match the 800 from 2007.  However, the average Blood Achohol Level of those arrested was considerably higher, leading to the conclusion, 'you can drive a man to drinking, but you can't make him stop!'....A recent Arizona poll asked whether residents thought illegal immigration was a serious problem.  Sixty percent responded, "Yes, it is a serious problem."  Forty percent said, "No es una problema seriosa."

Epilogue - For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program!

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Az I Laugh At It....

- In the produce aisle, a young lady asked Sharon for assistance.  "Excuse me," came the plea, "Do you know how to pick lemons?"  "Why, yes!" replied Sharon. "I've been married three times!"

- A woman has the last word in any argument.  Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument!

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Az I Use It....

- If your family is struggling to make the food budget, you may want to check out:   coupondivas.com and click on the 'Kids Eat Free Restaurants' listing.  This will allow you to see a listing of all restaurant chains that offer a 'Kids Eat Free' menu, including the days of each week that it is applicable!

- Arizona law now allows for individuals to establish a credit freeze on their accounts, to prevent or inhibit identity theft.  Each freeze will cost $5, and you must contact each of major credit reporting bureaus - Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion.

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The Reel Deal

Traitor - (PG-13, for violence) - starring Don headle, Guy Pearce and Jeff Daniels, with a supporting cast of many lesser-well-knowns

If you like Denzel Washington, you are missing out on one of this generation's best actors, if you haven't seen Don Cheadle.  A veteran of many great supporting roles, he has recently been given opportunities to star - and has not disappointed.  Unlike Denzel, Cheadle does not 'play to the camera,' instead letting the camera consume him! 
     In this spy/action thriller, Cheadle plays a double-agent(or does he?), and when Oscar nominations roll around, I'm betting that his name will surface for this one!  Filled with action and intrigue from the opening scene, the twists are not as predictable as one might assume, but interestingly written and well executed.  If you miss this one, you're a Traitor!

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Az I AARP It....

- Pearl Nancarrow, a retired teacher from Globe, has been named as recipient of Arizona's 2008 Andrus Award, for community service, symbolizing the power and ability to make a positive difference in people's lives, and so named for Ethel Percy Andrus, the retired California teacher who established AARP in 1958.  Congratulations, Pearl!

- AARP Tax-Aide, the nation's largest free, volunteer-run tax assistance service, is in need of computer equipment for the upcoming tax season.  Minimum requirements are :  Pentium 3 processor, with at least 800 MHz,
256MB Ram and 4GB hard disk drive.  Also, laser printers and laptops are needed.
     If you would lke to donate computers, printers, or any computer supplies, please contact Sue Key, at 623-203-0097;  or Merle Wessel, at 602-499-1915;  or e-mail to:  aztaxaide@yahoo.com

- AARP is urging Arizonans to vote 'NO,' on Proposition 200, because it allows the Pay Day Loan industry to circumvent the legal loan interest cap of 36%APR, and to charge as much as 400%APR.  It's time to put this industry out-of-business - which will happen, in 2010, because of previous legislation - but it will not happen, if Prop 200 passes!  Vote 'NO!'

- AARP Chapter #1, in Youngtown, Az., will have its next meeting on Friday, September 12th.  Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arapaio is scheduled to speak.  The meeting will begin at 5:30pm, with a potluck dinner, at the Youngtown Council Chambers, 112030 Clubhouse Square(on W. Alabama Ave, west of 112th Ave.)  All AARP members are welcome to attend, and if you would like to become a Chapter member, dues are only $5 annually.  For further information, contact Arky Muscato, Chapter #1 President, at 623-362-0605.

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Az I Laugh At It....

- George said, "I see you went crazy at the department store again," as Sharon brought in a carload of goods.  "Yeah," Sharon blushed.  "I almost bought their elevator, because it was marked Down!"

- What's the worst thing you can say to a man who claims his wife is frigid?  "No, she isn't!"

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Az I Use It....

- Driving 55 to 65mph can gain an additional 50 to 60 gallons of gasoline per tank, from driving 65 to 75mph OR from driving 45 to 55mph!

- Waiting in line at the gas station burns as much fuel as driving on the freeways at 30 to 40mph during 'rush hour!'  Costco gas remains about 10 cents per gallon cheaper than stand-alone stations!

- Drivers who personalize their autos with window decals, bumper stickers, special plates, etc., are 40% more likely to be prone to committing road rage, exhibiting the territorializing expressed in their 'artistic' repression.  Oh, yeah - and if they're from Arizona!

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Az I See It....

Prologue:  When a woman says, "NO!" she means "YES!" - but not with you!

International:  Answer - Russia, Iran, a newborn baby.  Question:  Name three things that suck!....And North Korea has ceased dismantling its nuclear program, because some promised sanction-relief has not been completed.  Isn't it amazing how all countries in need of disaster aid, food, debt-relief, and medical supplies show great homage to the U.S. - until the assistance is no longer necessary!  The Axis of Evil, and their supportive nations, are wanting John McCain to be president, because U.S. dependency on their oil resources for military activities, and our lack of effective anti-terrorist actions remains high.  Obama is their 'lesser of two evils!'

National:  Okay - of course Hillary Clinton would rather be the presidential candidate - and she may have asked Obama to be her running-mate.  She will still attain some high-level Cabinet post, or appointment to the U.S. Supreme Court, so don't feel too sorry for her!....So, Obama has too little experience to be president?  Remember Gov. Ronald Reagan(R-Ca), and Gov. Bill Clinton(D-Ar) had little 'experience,' but led the U.S. for 16 prosperous years.  Oh, right - there's VP George H.W. Bush(R-Tx) who had much experience, and his son, George W. Bush(R-Tx) who had little, and look where they led our nation for 12 years.  And John McCain?  An Arizona Senator whose State always ranks among the worst in any category that matters for quality-of-life issues(no, he cannot take credit for the weather!)....Latest rumor - John McCain is such a Bush supporter that he is considering Dick Chaney for his Vice President!(Nah, but I had to say it!)

State/Local:  APS is offering loans for home owners - up to $50K - to install solar equipment.  At interest rates from 7.99% to 12.99%, it estimates a possible 20-year payback.  Why not also allow customers to sell-back any extra-produced power, so that the investment could possibly be recouped in five years?  Oh, and we'll obtain our own lower-interest rates on loans, thank you!....Hometown US Airways has designed a plan to reduce their bad performance rating by as much as one-third.  Effective soon, they will be eliminating up to one-third of their flights!

Epilogue:  You only need two tools, in life.  If something doesn't move - and should - use WD-40.  If something moves - and shouldn't - use duct tape!

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Az I Eat It....

Logan's Roadhouse - 2501 W. Happy Valley Rd, with other locations in Gilbert, Mesa, Chandler and Yuma

     Well, it was time to restart the monthly 'Guys Night Out,' and nine of the guys attended.  The menu was quite varied, with American, seafood, steaks, ribs, and much more!  Appetizers were plentiful, and desserts looked delicious(we were too stuffed to order any!)  No one had any complaints about the taste or quantity of the dinners, the service was good(clean silverware, too), and there are dinner combo specials - 2 for $13.95 - that made it even more surprisingly delicious! 
     Our group also utilized several on-line coupon offers that brought the prices even lower(I think Kelly and Bo had money coming back, by the time they finished!)  Log-on to logansroadhouse.com, join the NUT-E Club, and you will receive a '$5 off' coupon in your e-mail the next day!  And while our group gets a little rambunctious, it is generally a family oriented establishment, with a sports bar atmosphere!  Try Logan's - it's one for the road!

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Az I Laugh At It....

- George was scolding Sharon, for consistently leaving her car keys in the ignition.  Sharon balked, "I do that, because if I take them out, I'll lose them!"  Countered George, "Well, what if someone steals your car?"  Sharon replied, "Oh, that's okay.  I always keep a spare set in the glove box!"

- Never argue with a woman when she is tired!  Or rested!

- Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation.  The other eight are unimportant!

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Az I AARP It....

- The next AARP Chapter #1 meeting will be on Friday, September 12th, @ 5:30pm, in the Youngtown Council Chambers - 112030 Clubhouse Drive, on W. Alabama Avenue(west of 112th Ave., in Youngtown, Az.  A potluck dinner will precede our scheduled guest speaker, Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio.  The meeting is open to all AARP members, but I encourage you to join our local chapter.  Annual chapter dues are only $5.00.  For further information, please call Arky Muscato, President, at 623-362-0605

- Another Prop 200 will soon appear on Arizona ballots.  This proposition, if approved, will allow the Payday Loan industry to continue business-as-usual, ending current legislation which will banish the industry in 2010.  I urge you vote 'NO' on 2008 Proposition 200, and tell the Payday Loan industry that you can't afford it!

- Life is unfair!  I lost my sunglasses at the beach,  my socks at the laundromat, and my keys at the stadium - and never found them.  I lost three pounds on a diet, and found them and five more!

- Know when you're getting old? 
1.  You and your teeth don't sleep together.
2.  It takes twice as much time to look half as as good.
3.  Your idea of weightlifting is standing up.
4.  It takes longer to rest as it does to get to tired.
5.  You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it to move.
6.  You wake up looking like your Driver's License photo.
7.  At breakfast, you hear 'snap, crackle, pop' and you're not eating cereal.

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Az I Use It....

- A recent Glamour magazine survey reports that 80% of women claim to have been creeped-out. at work, when an older man tried to have sex with them.  The other 20% got promotions!

- Biggest waste of gasoline, and creator of most urban smog?  All intersections that merit a traffic control light should also have turn-only lanes.  How aggravating is it to sit behind other vehicles, not able to turn, and the light won't?  With infrastructure modernization, it is astounding that 90% of these updated intersections are not appropriately widened, though the land is typically available to do so!

- Tired of junk mail?  Ready to make your world a bit 'greener?'  You can cancel unwanted publications, and remove your information from junk mail distribution lists.  Log-on to:     cataloguechoice.org    or    directmail.com
Millions of trees could be saved annually - but the price of U.S. Postal Service stamps could triple in one year, as this unwanted junk mail subsidizes consumer postage rates, contributing 40% of the annual USPS budget.

- Find out where speed traps are located - log-on to:  speedtrap.org/speedtraps/stetlist.asp
The site is regularly updated, so whether you travel, or hunt locally, you are always ready for Bear!

- There is a new, 'patriotic' Pepsi can being marketed, with a picture of the Empire State Building, and the "Pledge of Allegiance."  However, the words 'under God' have been eliminated from the Pledge, because Pepsi officials claim that they did not want to offend anyone.  So let's boycott Pepsi, because we would not want to offend anyone by paying with money that states 'In God We Trust' - would we?(Thanks, Phil

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Az I See It....

Prologue:  They say that John McCain is a 'Maverick.'  If I remember correctly, Maverick(played by James Garner, in the 1960's TV western series) was nothing more than a sharp-witted conman.  History repeats  itself - again!

International:  Across the southwestern U.S., WalMart has sold out of ammunition.  One reliable unnamed source said, "Russia may have invaded Georgia, but they sure as Hell ain't doin' it to Alabama!"....The U.S. military consumes approximately one-third of U.S. energy requirements - most of it for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan!

National:  30% of Mexicans favor Sen. Obama, for president, while only 6% favor Sen. McCain.  The other 64% refused to participate in the survey for fear of being deported!....Immigration appears to an item of major difference, between the two candidates.  Obama would allow illegals to stay in the U.S and be able to vote, while McCain holds the opposite view - he would allow them to vote, and be able to stay in the U.S!....After deriding Obama's recent European journey, McCain visited the oil rigs, off the coast of Louisiana - ignoring the mainland, where thousands still reside in tents under highway overpasses, and abandoned automobiles more than dot the landscape.  Says much of McCain's political priorities - it's all about the oil!....Oil companies donate almost $150B annually to Republican congressmen, who just voted to shelve an effort to tax oil companies' profits, which already receive $9B in annual tax relief!

State/Local:  The cost of food has continued to rise, even though the public was told that inflationary prices were due to increased fuel expenses and decreased availability of corn(animal feed, ethanol, etc.)  Now, energy prices have declined, and farmers report record corn crops - yet food prices continue to climb!

Epilogue:  One study recounts that if your dog runs away, it is more likely to be found if it has an ID microchip implanted under its hide.  In a related report, your dog is 65% more likely to run away if it knows you approved of someone cutting into its hide to implant an ID microchip!

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Az I Teach It....

- My good friend, and long-time colleague, Paul B., is so committed to his wife that he left an 18-year teaching position, to eliminate what had been a 'weekend marriage' situation.  In so doing, he took a 40% pay cut - just for going to a different school district!  Arizona has no concern for the education of its children, as evidenced by the inability to retain quality teachers who cannot afford to remain in the profession, and typically leave for another.  Marana is lucky to have you, Paul!

- Corporal punishment, for incorrigible students, has continued in some states, despite minorities more likely being spanked.  Since 2000, in states where corporal punishment is outlawed, there has been a 300% increase in physical assaults on teachers, and reports of student bullying has increased nearly 400%!

- The presidents of more than 100 major colleges and universities are promoting an initiative to lower the national alcohol-drinking age to 18, from 21, reasoning that underage drinkers are more likely to binge-drink to 'flaunt the law.'  All research clearly shows that '21' saves lives, and Mothers Against Drunk Driving will make certain that the legal drinking age will never be lowered, even if these idiot-prexys don't get it!  Besides, there are only two reasons why underage people drink - to get loaded, and to get laid - the same reasons as of-age drinkers!

- When a business makes a mistake, they call it a capital loss.  When a school district makes a mistake, they call it a high school graduate!

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Az I Laugh At It....

     From the beginning:  Sharon went to a 'senior's' church function, where she met George.  They danced every dance together.  Afterward, they went for coffee and bagels.  As they walked home, Sharon said, "You remind me of my third husband."  George asked, "Really?  How many times have you been married?"  Sharon replied, "Twice!"

     Two years later:  Sharon told her psychiatrist, "I'm feeling guilty, spending all of George's money.  Can you help me?"  The doctor replied, "I can!  By the time we're finished, you will no longer feel compelled to spend George's money."  Sharon blurted, "Are you crazy?  I just want you to help me not feel guilty!"




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Az I See It....

Prologue:  I'm back!  Please forward this to everyone you think may(or may not) be interested, as I would like to build my subscriber list into the thousands!  Thank you!

International:  The Bush/McCain-backed surge did not work, as they claim it has.  The increased presence was not an offensive tactic, but merely a 'show-off of force.'  U.S. troops and Iraqi citizens continue to die, at varying rates monthly.  Of course, Obama's 'face-to-face' tactics have not worked either, as Iran has refused to step-down from their nuclear policies, regardless of international consequences.  Multiple intelligence agencies proclaim that death squads have trained in Iran, and will soon enter Iraq, targeting political and judicial officials, as well as American troops.  Where is Harry Truman when you need him(or someone like him?)....Russia's Vladimir Putin says he will not stop his siege on Georgia until he reaches Atlanta, site of the Georgian web-server(actually!)....Russian military offensives have displaced 100k Georgians, and the U.S. and the rest of the world will now expedite humanitarian aid.  Meanwhile, the more than 400k displaced from Louisiana(hurricanes Katrina and Rita, in 2005) are still pleading for assistance, with many who remained still living in squalor!....Israel is ready to attack Iran if it does not abandon its nuclear program, according to several high-level Israeli officials.  Their 'surge' will be immediate, effective, and OVER!

National:  Reports of rats in Chicago homes have decreased, from more than 22k to around 18k, in the last year.  Some attribute the decline to better home hygiene, while informed sources claim threats from rat bosses has intimidated home owners to not file complaints!....Tired of all the multi-billionaires telling the working class to spend our meager resources on going green?  If each of these money-hoarders donated $1B each, they could save the planet and create new avenues for their incomes.  Talk is cheap(Yeah, you, T. Boone Pickens!)....And God bless all of the celebrities donating to the worthy causes of the many Third World countries, where people are starving, homeless, and disease-ridden.  Too bad there are millions of Americans suffering the same inhumanities, for which very little is ever done!....Can you imagine towing a load of anything in a KIA, instead of a truck?  We don't need smaller vehicles, but rather more affordable, fuel-efficient models of all sizes!

State/Local:  Arizona ranks 45th among states, and Phoenix is 42nd among major cities, when it comes to volunteering.  Seems Arizonans are either uncharitable, too busy working, or too illegal to volunteer!....Violent crime is down in Arizona.  Officials speculate that increased enforcement tactics and efforts are likely responsible, while residents speculate that enforcing voter-approved laws, and Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio's anti-crime sweeps have caused illegal immigrants/criminals to lay low or leave Arizona.  Maricopa County Attorney Andrew Thomas is being investigated, for possible disciplinary action, for his enforcement of Prop 100, a voter-approved initiative demanding that illegals be held without bond for certain serious crimes.  Arizona is a major sanctuary for illegals, and the recent 'new clarifications' in the Tucson Police Department's enforcement tactics will not serve to protect U.S. citizens  The percentage of crimes in Arizona, by illegal residents, remains constant!....It is ironically sad that APS and SRP have reported a 40% increase in late payments and utility shut-offs, citing a poor economy.  They fail to acknowledge their own several-tiered increases(much higher than the inflation rate), which has outpaced Arizonan's pay increases(much lower than the inflation rate), as having any significant effect!....Phoenix is rated as one of the best metropolitan areas, for having few 'pockets' of low-income neighborhoods.  Low-income families are more spread into working-class areas, and teachers continue to be more likely to be termed 'working poor!'....Arizona teen girls rank 4th highest for pregnancy rate, 9th highest in school dropout rate, and are more likely to drink alcohol and use other drugs, than teen girls nationwide!

Epilogue:  The U.S. has finally outlawed lead, for use in children's toys.  Now the only lead that is still hazardous to our youth is contained in the bullets which claim more young lives than any other source!

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Az I see It....

- Recent government 'estimates' are that there are 500,000 illegals living in Arizona, well below the 1,000,000 that is closer to being realistic!  They just do not want you to know the TRUTH!

- Arizona's DUI laws are again among the toughest in the nation.  Even DUI boaters will now serve 10 days in jail for a first offense!

- Rumor has it that if McCain wins the presidency, Gov. Napolitano will appoint Stu Starky to serve out the remainder of his Senate term(2 years), but Starky must first switch to the Republican Party(for at least 2 years!)  Starky opposed McCain, quite admirably, in the 2004 Arizona Senate race, winning the Black vote, the womens' vote, the Native American vote, the Jewish vote, and the blue collar White vote.  Who knew the redneck Republican voters, the state majority, would even stop drinking long enough to poke some chads?!

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Az I Laugh At It....

Joel's Jewels:

- A woman has the last word in any argument.  Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument!

- A woman marries a man expecting that he will change, but he doesn't.  A man marries a woman expecting that she will not change, but she does!

- Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more wiling to die!

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Az I AARP It....

- Since 2000, Medicare premiums have doubled, to $96.40/mo.  Lend your support to ensuring that Congress acts responsibly, by logging-on to:  keepmedicarefair.org

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Az I Use It....

- Adelaide's Ads:

     Gasoline - $4.25/gal

     Vicks Nyquil - 6 oz. bottle @ $178/gal

     Pepto Bismol - 4 oz. bottle @ $123.00/gal

     Gatorade - 20 oz bottle - @ $10.00/gal

     Printer Ink - $5,200.00/gal

     Evian - 9 oz. bottle - @$21.00/gal

     Scope Mouthwash - @ $84.00/gal

Actual costs/gallon for non-sale consumer goods!  Thanks, Adelaide!

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Az I see It....

- Hillary Clinton gave a great concession speech - kind of like the speech given by Geraldine Ferraro, in 1984, when she said her candidacy paves the way for women to be elected to the U.S. Presidency.  Twenty-four years later, and still not going to happen!  Also, did you hear what Clinton actually said - she is SUSPENDING her campaign - not ENDING it!  She also referred to only three Democrats being elected to the nation's highest office in the past forty years - twice it was Bill Clinton, and the nation thrived, both economically and globally.  Stepford women blew America's last chance to really make a change.  All because they couldn't get past Bill's personal indiscretions, and the fact that Hillary did not throw him out!  And shame on Oprah!

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Az I Laugh At It....

- Sharon describes George as someone who will stand beside her through all of the trouble he wouldn't have had if he'd only stayed single in the first place! 

- Phil was going out, when Carol asked, "Where are you going?"  Phil answered, "To the doctor, to get some Viagra."  Carol got up, and put on her coat.  Phil asked, "Where are you going?"  Carol replied, "To the doctor.  If you're going to use that rusty old thing again, I'm going to get a tetanus shot!"

- George was sitting with Sharon, when she gently took off his glasses and said, "You know George, without your glasses, you look like the same handsome young man I knew 30 years ago."  George replied, "You know, Sharon, without my glasses, you still look pretty good, too!"(Happy 2nd Anniversary, Sharon & George!)

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Az I see It....

- The cost of a gallon of gasoline is skyrocketing - and with no cause other than the greed of your local retailer!  Anti-trust monopoly laws prohibit retailers from price-fixing, so here's how they set their prices:  they have someone from the station drive around the immediate area(usually around 2-sq. miles), surveying what each station is charging - and then set their own price accordingly!  And at no time did they ever actually speak to, or agree upon prices with other owners!  This is even true of Costco stations.  There is no reason for gasoline to be so expensive, based upon supply and demand - which has remained consistent!  Your local gas station owners are laughing at us, in whatever language they laugh in!

- Senator Ted Kennedy is recuperating after brain tumor surgery.  After the surgery, when asked about his schedule of appearances for the Obama campaign, Kennedy exclaimed, "Obama?  I endorsed Obama?"

- The gene for red hair is recessive in humans, and it is estimated that by the year 2100, red hair will be out of the human genome.  Guess what?  As long as there are men and hair dye, there will always be red-headed women!

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Az I Play It....

- Well, here's another twist in the professional baseball career of Mike Muscato.  After returning from injury, and having an exceptional game(2-for-3, 1R, 1 RBI), Mike was released by the Brockton Rox - being told that their returning .220 hitting catcher(Lee Rubin) would not be benched in favor of Muscato, though they openly state that Muscato has the better skills.  Mike was going to ask to be released anyway, because the Somerset Patriots, whom he worked with for a month, before joining the Rox, want him to return, as they admire his work-ethic and abilities - and now have a roster spot available for him.
     So, let's see - the lowly AA(CanAm League) also-ran(the Rox) cannot utilize a career .305 catcher/outfielder, but the highly-rated, AAA(Atlantic League) Somerset Patriots believe that he is just what they need to continue pursuit of a Championship!  Tough league!


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Az I Play It....

- Mike Muscato made his 2008 debut, for the Brockton Rox of the Canadian-American Professional Baseball League, after recovering from a foot injury, and it was impressive!  Muscato went 2-for-3, with a BB, an RBI and a run scored, while calling a shutout game for his pitcher, before being taken out for a pinch-runner after five innings, defeating the Nashua Pride 13-5.  Immediately after being replaced, the Pride scored all of their 5 runs in the sixth inning - off the other catcher, and the same starting Rox pitcher.  Great job, Mike! 

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Az I Laugh At It....

- Joey asked George, "To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"  George replied, "I owe it all to my wife, Sharon!"  "Wow," exclaimed Joey, "She must be some woman.  What were you before you married her?"  George cried, "I was a billionaire!"

- A policeman stopped Sharon for speeding, and nicely asked to see her Driver's License.  In a huff, Sharon replied, "I wish you guys would get your act together.  Just yesterday you take away my license, and now today you expect me to show it to you!"

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Az I see It....

- Phoenix, Arizona will hold its annual July 4th fireworks display, having obtained the necessary $120K from corporate donations.  How comforting that major, local corporations are willing to donate huge amounts to frivolity, when the food banks are literally BEGGING for water, and food for the homeless, and other less fortunate!

- The South Mountain Citizens Advisory Team listened to impact predictions from the ADOT Freeway Study Team, to determine the effects from blasting through the side of South Mountain, for the proposed Pecos Road freeway alignment in Ahwatukee, which will connect the I-10 to the Loop 101, at 55th Avenue.  Noted concerns were for possible fissures, long-term effects on plant life, and for mountain degradation.  Huh?  We have those concerns wherever there are humans in the Valley of the Sun.  You can bet your sweet sunshine there'll be blasting as soon as is possible!

- Research is almost complete on a new contraceptive patch for women.  The patch, approximately 3 inches in diameter, reads "Get Away From Me!"



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Az I Use It....

- There are multiple resources available for those in need of quality funeral services.  The industry has recently been compared to having the veracity and audacity of proverbial used car salesmen.  To make sure that your loved ones are not taken advantage of, at a time when they may be the most vulnerable, log-on to:

Arizona State Funeral Board - www.funeralbd.state.az.us

Arizona
Funeral Consumer Alliance - www.azconsumer.org  or call 480-929-9659

Federal Trade Commission Funeral Consumers Guide - www.ftc.gov/bcp/conline/pubs/services/funeral.shtm

Interfaith
Funeral Information Committee - funerals-ripoffs.org  or call 480-303-0857

If you would like to access a price survey database, log-on to:  datacentral.azcentral.com

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Az I Laugh At It....

- From Peter Z. - Beer is now cheaper than gasoline, so drink - don't drive!

- What is the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?  A good lawyer knows the law.  A great lawyer knows the judge!

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Az I Laugh At It....

- George walked into the bar and said, "Pour me a stiff one.  I just had another fight with Sharon."  "Oh!  And how did this one end?" asked the barkeep.  "When it was over, she came to me on her hands and knees,"  answered George.  "Really?" said the barkeep, "Now that's a switch.  What exactly did she say?"  George replied, "She said, 'Come out from under the bed, you little chicken!"

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Az I AARP It....

- The next general meeting for AARP Chapter #1 will be on Friday, September 12th, at 5:30pm.  The guest speaker will be Maricopa County Sheriff Joseph Arpaio!

- Two elderly gentlemen were discussing their lives.  The first said, "I'm 83 years old, and full of aches and pains!  You're about my age - how do you feel?"  The second replied, "I feel just like a newborn baby!  I've got no hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants!

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Az I see It....

- On Memorial Day, all Americans are invited to stand in observance of a National Moment of Remembrance - in silence and in spirit - for 60 seconds - at exactly 3:00pm local time.  The purpose being to honor America's fallen, and for the freedoms for which they fought, which we may sometimes take for granted!

- The U.S. Senate has passed legislation, which will add at least $10B in benefits for veteran's, the poor, and the unemployed - daring to overturn President Bush's threatened veto(Bush is against money for anything but his war!)  The money was added to the Bush war spending bill.  Sens. Clinton and Obama voted for and Sen. McCain was absent, but opposed!  He claims that veterans benefits should be earned with years of service.  I suppose that means that a soldier that is shot, maimed or emotionally scarred in his fifth year of duty should be more entitled to better benefits than the GI that suffers the same in his first year.  Good job of fiscal conservatism, John - the soldier with longer service may well be out-lived by his younger counterpart, saving megabucks for your war chest!

- Who suffers most as gasoline prices soar, and why is nothing being done to curtail the problem?  Rich politicians do not notice the difference, as many of their expenses are typically paid from tax appropriations.  While they ride in limousines, or other public-paid vehicles, most families are forced to choose between basic staples and their normal American lifestyle, for which they have worked much harder than most politicians, who only ride more slowly, if only to watch their constituents squirm!

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Az I Use It....

- Looking for inexpensive summer vacations?  Log-on to:  site59.com  or lastminute.com  for travel deals you may not be able to resist!

- Flagstaff, Az has canceled its July 4th fireworks show - forever!  Not only will they avoid fire dangers, in the parched northern sector, but they will save many thousands of dollars in this depressed economy.  Some aspiring politician may even balance a budget, feed the hungry or house the homeless.  Well, it was worth a mention, anyway!

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Az I Laugh At It....

- Sharon said, "When we get married, I want to keep my house."  George replied, " That's fine with me!"  Sharon continued, "I also want to get a Cadillac."  "Sure," said George.  Sharon ventured, "And I want to have sex six times per week!"  "George said, "Put me down for Fridays!"

- The Vatican has decreed that it is not sinful to kiss a nun.  Just don't get into the habit!

- "Sharon," said George, "Now that we're married, do you think you will be able to live on my modest income?"  "Of course," said Sharon, "No trouble at all - but what will you live on?"

- If Iran was to attack Turkey from the rear, would Greece help?


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Az I Teach It....

- Arizona teachers are again disrespected and devalued.  While the state grants 'instant teacher' status - with additional salary incentives - to fill high school vacancies in math and science, the certified veterans, who earned their positions, must take additional course work to prevent from being fired, and endure low pay, poor benefits, and lack of administrative support.  There might not be a teacher shortage, if these problems were honestly and successfully addressed!

- Gov. Napolitano has vetoed HB 2557, intended to protect PE, music, and art classes from district budget cuts, leaving the decisions to the discretion of local school boards - another step forward for 'loco-control!'

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Az I See It....

- Want to save 10, 15, even 20 cents per gallon of gasoline?  Fill up today, as tomorrow the price will be higher!

- The Supreme Court has decided that U.S. paper money is discriminatory for the sight-disadvantaged.  New designs will soon be available, in denominations of 86, 87, 93 and 94 octanes!

- President Bush is rebuffed, by Saudi sheiks, in an effort to control U.S. gasoline prices.  OPEC leaders insist that U.S. demand is not significantly increased from previous levels.  U.S. oil execs claim that our demand is greatly increased, and $130/barrel oil will soon be a bargain.  While Arabs are paying 50 cents/gallon of gasoline, our troops are shedding blood for Iraqi oil that is sent to countries opposed to our military action in Iraq!

- Sen. Ted Kennedy, 76, has been diagnosed with a malignant, life-threatening brain tumor.  That explains his support for Barack Obama, instead of decades-long friend and colleague Hillary Clinton!

- With the sympathetic, public outpouring, on Kennedy's behalf, the family of Mary Jo Kopeckne must be stunned!

- Sen. Obama always cites his grandfather's exemplary military service record, when defending his own patriotism.  However, he had never served in the military!

- Lisa Graham Keegan is Sen. McCain's